Australian author and academic Stephanie Charlesworth who worked with John Haynes in the 1990s said of him:
'John Haynes maintains that the professional task of the mediator is to focus on the conversation between the parties. He explores the client's world through their own eyes, as far as it is relevant to the dispute'.
'The focus is not on changing attitudes to problems, making them better people in themselves or worthy members of the community but simply to help them make decisions that are mutually satisfactory and workable about matters in dispute.'
Charlesworth noted that Haynes's ideas were constantly evolving. She stated:
"For many years I thought Haynes was a gifted, even brilliant practitioner but that his theory, (I see a model as an operational view of the theory), was basically simple. I now see it has coherent, sophisticated, highly adaptable if perhaps as yet in complete."
John Haynes approach is based on the principle that you take the parties as you find them not as you would like them to be. If the parties can jointly solve the problem, it can have a therapeutic effect on each of them and their relationship, but it should not be promoted as having therapeutic benefits per se. It is just helping them get through an impasse. Anything else that comes out of it is just an added bonus.
The way I would express it is the following quote from my recent mediate.com paper:
"I have no idea what I will do when I go to mediate a matter. After 30 years of mediation practice the only thing I know is that the parties are stuck.
I don't have a toolbox of skills, insightful questions, or any mediation theory that I bring to the room.
I have no desire to change people, to teach cooperation or to understand their emotions or their so-called bias. I don't look for patterns, create hypotheses and I don't try to predict or control what will happen.
As a mediator, I am no hero. I don't seek to help, find a solution or solve the parties' problem.
I am a blank canvas. I have no answers.
I just help get the interaction going and then get out of the way. Things happen during interactions. Something will emerge. I improvise. It's a multi-dimensional experience. It's noisy, messy and imperfect but they are the ingredients for change."
See The Art of the Simple in Mediation - Mediate.com
This is the link to the John Haynes Michael and Debbie U-tube mediation: https://youtu.be/l5mBchRroQI I would encourage you to look at it with an open mind.
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Greg Rooney
Mediator
Mediator
Mount George SA
61405612789
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Original Message:
Sent: 27-01-2023 01:35 PM
From: Jacky Stock
Subject: Observing a Mediation - John Haynes, mediator - Michael and Debbie
Hi Nina,
As an FDRP I would agree with you. It is a little "old school". However, the benefits of watching it are still there because it makes one think about whether or not you would handle it that way, and, if not, why not? What would you do differently? It still offers the opportunity for thought and reflection.
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Jacky Stock
FDRP
J L Stock Mediation
Gordon NSW
404040866
Original Message:
Sent: 26-01-2023 09:36 AM
From: Nina Harding
Subject: Observing a Mediation - John Haynes, mediator - Michael and Debbie
Thanks for posting this video of Dr John Haynes, a pioneer of family mediation in the US. His famous quotes include "There is good in everybody and if you want mediation to work, you must find the good in people." It is really wonderful to watch Dr Haynes at work, but I must say, some of what he is doing, is mediation of the past. In this video all of the communication goes through the mediator, these days we would endeavour to have the parties communicating with each other, recognising that Michael and Debbie will be communicating with each other for at least 13 more years and the mediation is an opportunity to work out how to do that. I remember the style of mediation that we see in this video, I think I had the same suit in the 80s that Debbie is wearing! So for those of you who are newer to mediation I make the following comments, these days we wish to empower the parties in mediation, so they understand the process is not about the mediator, but about helping them to have the conversation they need to have, these days a mediator will assist parties to ask the questions they have wanted to ask, to improve their understanding(it is not about what the mediator wants to know or learn). When Debbie and Michael start talking in the video, Dr Haynes very quickly shuts this down by asking more of his own questions, these days we would encourage the participants to speak to one another, intervening only when necessary, or to note progress. The seating suggests that Debbie and Michael are visiting a Specialist or the School Principal's office, this seating is not conducive to good communication and would feel very uncomfortable when there are high levels of anger or emotion. In the video the mediator suggests options, such as 'What about if Jocelyn doesn't stay over for 2months?' this would be better handled by the mediator saying 'You have told us that you are concerned about Jocelyn staying the night, as things are new and might be confusing for the children, when do you think it would be less concerning?' When Michael says 'I would leave you a note (about homework)', the Mediator says that wouldn't be a good idea. These days we would ask the other participant for their view. I actually thought a note about homework progress or problems would be workable. I also need to note, I am not a FDRP, so it would be great to hear from some FDRPs on this video.
I am keen to produce a new video to demonstrate an exemplar of mediation, as so many of the existing videos do not demonstrate the NMAS standards or the RI model of mediation.
Thanks again Greg, for sharing this video of the late great Dr Haynes.
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Nina Harding
Senior Mediator
Nina Harding Mediation Services Pty Ltd
NORTH SYDNEY NSW
0408 447 525
Original Message:
Sent: 25-01-2023 02:34 PM
From: Greg Rooney
Subject: Observing a Mediation - John Haynes, mediator - Michael and Debbie
Observe John Haynes' mediation style in this Utube video as he works with Michael and Debbie to help them move forward from their current impasse.
I suggest you view his approach from the perspective of flow - how Haynes keeps the flow going and his use of a sidestep to an 'adjacent possible' where he strikes an impasse. His use of time (time is the mediator's friend).
You will note that he takes no notes, does not use a white board and does not have a set agenda.
I would suggest ignoring the 'toolbox of skills' approach when viewing this video. His interventions are unique only to this moment in time. Merely listing them has no theoretical value outside this context. Context is everything with respect to mediation theory. Context is a fluid state.
See the following link: Observing a Mediation - John Haynes, Mediator - Michael and Debbie - YouTube
This is the second U-tube video in the series 'Observing a Mediation'. This is the link to the first one. Observing a Mediation, Greg Rooney Mediator. The Tennis Club Lease - YouTube
Both examples demonstrate how the law of flow is at the heart of the mediation encounter.
Notation: The John Haynes Utube is an old copy taken from a video and is a bit rickety - I have tried to source a better copy but have not been able to make contact with the estate of the late John Haynes
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Greg Rooney
Mediator
Mediator
Mount George SA
61405612789
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